strangeness

I am on the airport on the way to New York.
It's a strange experience. Probably the reason is the way I've thought of my dreams, to be something that couldn't materialize. But now this has. I've been going through the steps in the last months, and finishing the 5th was a huge relief. Now I have to pray for the higher power to be with me on this trip, and look after me.
The other reason is that I've been working towards this goal for the last year. Applying was easy, but all the paperwork that followed was pure hell. But this seemed to be the only way to go. At least whatever I did in the last year was my own decision. Most of my life has felt like being on auto pilot. Maybe that's not a bad thing, seeing that nothing is better or worse. But in terms of what is better or worse for me, it's better to leave.
lífið er tröppugangur
sagði fróður maður við mig einusinni.
tröppugangurinn er í öllu sem við gerum, sama hvað það er.